By Lexi Koch.
Are you a woman that spends the majority of her time taking care of others? Is your business service-based, in which you dream of making other people’s lives healthier, happier, richer and more wholesome?
As women, we are the caretakers, the healers, the helpers. We are the ones who tend to think of everyone else and their needs before our own. As business owners, we juggle the demands of our families, businesses and clients and want to show up as loving, present and helpful as we can to all of those roles.
But really, how can we be the best help to others if we aren’t helping ourselves? When we’re depleted, overwhelmed, burned out and spread too thin we’re not being of best service to others. Not only do we need to keep ourselves on the agenda but also, we need to keep ourselves emotionally vibrant.
I know that as I work on myself, I continuously learn new tools to bring to my clients and improve the service I provide. So not only am I healthier for myself, I’m healthier for my clients. I’m not bringing my baggage with me. I know there is a separate time and place for me to address what’s going on for me personally outside of the sacred time I have with my clients.
If you know that you are drained from providing services to others all the time and need a reboot, these ideas that might give you a fresh perspective when working with your people.
1. Find a coach or mentor for yourself.
Just because you help others doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve support yourself. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you are supposed to be perfect and have all of the answers. The absolute best coaches and healers I know, have mentors, teachers and coaches of their own. Think of it like continuing education for your soul. We need to refill our own cups in order to stay strong and healthy.
2. Prioritise yourself in the midst of taking care of everyone else.
Since you do run your own business, use it to your advantage! No one is telling you to work all the time. Try not to be your own critic but instead give yourself permission to take the time and space you need to recharge. You will show up even more powerfully to those you wish to serve. If you come up against resistance to this idea, take a pause to see what story you have around taking time away from work for your other interests and needs. Busting this story could be a game changer for you.
3. Model for your clients what you wish they would do for themselves.
If you are proposing that people take time to exercise or have a mindset practice or are honest when they need to rest, be authentic and practice those things yourself. When you are sick, allow yourself to take sick time just as you wish your clients would do for themselves. And when you have a big win, allow yourself to celebrate that win just as you would want your clients to do. They want you to be a real person with real ups and downs to draw from.
4. Check your intentions.
At the top of a journal page simply write, ‘What am I hoping to get from serving others?’ If answers like recognition, worth, validation or acknowledgement come up for you, notice that. When we serve from a hope to get something from someone else, we march toward overwhelm and energy depletion MUCH faster. Let yourself journal it out, note where you can give yourself that recognition and work toward your services coming from a place of genuine giving instead of hope of receiving. No one else knows how to meet your needs and recognise you in the way you hope.
It’s a big job to be of service to others. Allow your own cup to be full, your intentions to be clear and give yourself the support you so deserve. Your clients will surely thank you.
Lexi Koch is an intuitive life transformation coach who empowers women gain a profound knowing of themselves. Within the sacred and soulful space of sessions with her, clients are guided to see that their overwhelm, feelings of being spread too thin and burnout are a cry from within to find spaciousness, presence and to know themselves on a whole new level.
Working with Lexi is a process of befriending all parts of yourself through visualisations, deep introspection, calling out Stories and getting to the bottom of what’s been keeping you stuck. The best part is having someone who by completely meeting you wherever you are at teaches you how to do the same for yourself.
To find out if overwhelm is where you’re getting hung up, take her free quiz (and get your Companion Guide with practical tools to start implementing today).